It’s weird, how self-awareness changes so many things. well, maybe it isn’t weird if you’ve had it for a while, but I’m fairly new to the whole knowledge-of-own-identity thing, so it’s odd. Odd in a good way, usually, but also a bit odd in a bad way.
Anyway. All my flatmates now have tinder, which on it’s website describes itself as “like real life, but better”. Basically, you use tinder to find hot guys/girls/squid and then you like them, and if they like you back you’re a match and then you can find out if they’re just in it for the sex or if they want to go out or whatever. A bit like seeing someone in the street and running up to them all like “hi! Wanna go out with me?” Obviously this method does leave you open to a lot of … erm, sadness? Especially if a ‘hot guy’ turns out to be a total dick-head.
That’s not the awkward thing. The awkward thing is when they turn to me and ask ‘is this person hot?’ Yes, generally the person is a bloke, I’m not gonna lie. It’d be fairly surprising if Josh or Chi went on tinder, but hey, I wouldn’t judge them if they did.
But that’s not what’s important right now. The really important thing is that my female flatmates will occasionally turn to me and ask “what about this one?” That’s the key thing. And I’m beginning to see that when I say “oh, that person looks ok” I geenerally mean they look fairly clean and somewhat symmetrical. I don’t think those are the key features of hotness. Sometimes I even think, “that person’s eyes are pretty” but I don’t know if that’s why you’re even on tinder.
I don’t really want to make the whole of this about being aroace, but I am and in this case (haha rhyme) it happens to be relevant. And I have no idea if I should maybe mention it to them. It does seem a bit odd just to tell people so they’ll stop talking to me about tinder. I dunno, what do you think?