One of the downsides of being a student is that they do expect you to do coursework, occasionally. They probably also expect me to do revision, but I’m way too cool for that stuff. And also I’m extremely lazy, so shhhhh.
Anyway, something I can’t really get out of doing is my composition assignment. And there are a lot of questions I have about that. Like, why did I choose to compose as one of my modules when I’m an absolute shite composer? And, why did I choose to compose a piece in a style that I hate? And, why did I even choose composition given that it was completely optional this year? Questions indeed.
So, I’ve done approximately 1:30 of the damn thing and I’m pretty sure it’s a bucket of rubbish. But hey, at least I’ve got a semi-decent essay to reassure me that I’m not terrible at coursework, so that’s something.
I am vain. Ludicrously so, in fact. I can barely go past a mirror without examining my face in it to make sure I still look the same as I did half an hour ago when I went and got my last cup of tea. (generally speaking I do) I have to double-check my face in the morning just to make sure it hasn’t done anything weird while I was in the other room doing whatever I was doing. Breakfast, possibly. I often have breakfast in the morning, and I hear that’s actually quite common. I will spend quite a long time every day fluffing my hair up to the appropriate degree – the downside of having hair as soft as a baby duck is that it sometimes does weird things, like all gathering together in the way that baby ducks do – and if it isn’t right I have been known to wash it again just to make it do the thing. DO THE THING.
I am petty. Oh man am I petty. There are people I hate in my year for the reason that they did something very small at the beginning of the year and I never forgave them for it. But what was the thing? I have no idea, because I forgot. You can see the huge impact the thing had on me. And I’m not just petty, I’m vengefully petty. I will remember that you did a thing six months ago that I didn’t like – even if I don’t quite remember the details – and then when you need something I’ll be mysteriously unavailable. But I’ll make it seem like I really would have helped, if I hadn’t just suddenly organised a trip to London. Good god I am a terrible person. Oh well, I’m sure the orchestra rehearsal went on fine without me.
hmm, what else. I’m controlling. In a very empathetic sort of way, or a moral way. You know, for your own good. Oh, you haven’t eaten dinner? Let me make something for you. Oh, you have a lecture tomorrow morning that you often miss? Shall I wake you up? Like you’re a tiny child?
OK, so that’s basically just a list of not totally positive features, but you know it’s important to own things like that. So if someone accuses you of being petty in a fight you can say “yes, I am!” rather than “no! I am upset and angry”.
Anyway, that’s that. Basically, just an exercise in naval-gazing, don’t bother reading if you don’t want to. Wait, too late.
I’m calling this a music student activity because I’m a music student and I’m doing it. shhhh that’s totally logic ok?
Tomorrow (today?) I’m hosting a ‘dinner party’. I don’t really know if it counts because we’ll be eating non-dinner party food and we’ll all be drinking schloer and water from a jug. We may well end up using cups instead of just drinking from the jug, but that’s not the point. The POINT is that even though it feels kind of not-fancy due to just being six of my friends (and my dad and my sister. Can I get an “aaaaaaaaaaah”?) who will probably be on someone’s phone the whole time I’m in the kitchen, and I feel like that damn balloon video is going to get a lot of screentime. Most of the views on that thing must be from us, I’m sure of it.
Well, despite all that, I still don’t want to give anyone food poisoning. As a completely random and non-specific example. And I don’t want them to hate the food I’m doing, even though I’ve only ever actually made one of the courses – fuck???? why did I choose things I didn’t know if I could make? oh well how hard can rice pudding be – so I don’t really know how they’re going to go. Hopefully well.
Anyway, if you’re interested, here’s the menu: Stuffed red peppers, chicken curry, rice pudding. It’s a bit more dressed up than that, but that’s essentially it.
Never mind the fact that 9 (or 8. it’s complicated) people will be eating this so I’d better not mess it up. Never mind the fact that I should probably be putting the rice pudding on at the exact moment I’ll be serving up the starter. NEVER MIND ALL THAT IT’S GOING TO BE GREAT