Today is a slightly odd day.

Yesterday I was basically brimming with energy. I was leaping up and down the stairs, I had enough energy to go and scrub all the limescale off the shower downstairs. I even managed to do Social Interaction with people and animals. That was cool.

And today it’s kind of… er

like, I just spent five minutes being slightly freaked out by my fingers. they don’t look right today.

It can be hard to work up the motivation to do things, even things that might give me more energy. Like get food. (but it’s two floors down bleh)

so I’ve sort of been sitting on my bed all afternoon doing not very much



Voyages on the Orient Express,

I came up to Yorkshire to visit my mum this weekend. Hooray! The downside of that is the 4 1/2 hour train journey required to get from Egham to Malton (and at least 40 minutes of that was just getting into London. Egham is not a convenient place to live.


So that’s how I started the day. Very early. It’s not my fault it literally takes minutes to print pre-bought tickets from the machine! (A lot less stressful than I was imagining. so that’s good.)

There was a man wandering around the station inspecting tickets. Mysteeeerious.

The train to Waterloo was pretty uneventful, apart from the guy on the train who just kept talking to me. Seriously? Monosyllabic answers didn’t give away the fact I wasn’t interested in talking to you? No?

And then my accidental tube-etiquette fail when I let one woman with a pram on the tube and then got in the way of another woman with a pram. And then another woman hit me with her bag. OK THAT’S GREAT. CLEARLY FRIDAY IS A BUSY TUBE DAY?!?!

Enough rage. Let’s get on the train to Newcastle!

Or I would, if they just told me the sodding platform it was leaving from. Thanks, Kings Cross staff. Couldn’t do it without you.

I very kindly swapped seats with a woman who couldn’t get a seat with her 4 year old son. (I know, such a martyr) And then the train left… a bit late, but I’m sure we’ll make up the time! I have a connection train at York to catch! At 16:40! The train gets there at 16:30… or maybe 16:35, but I’m sure I’ll catch it.

Oh, random woman? You didn’t understand the tickets? Thought there was a 33 aisle and a 33 window? Nope, just one seat 33. That’s generally how it works. You’re not getting this seat mate. jog on

(train journeys make me grumpy)


Of course, we arrived in York 20 minutes late. I had forgotten to eat, so my first call was to a cafe to nab a hot chocolate and caramel shortbread. (everyone else calls them millionaire shortbread, Yorkshire. Just saying) And then I had to defend being on the wrong train to the ticket inspector, who seemed extremely unimpressed. It’s not my fault! Don’t blame me! Blame those wankers at Kings Cross!


How to: All the things you need to know to get through uni life

How to get lost in 7 easy steps

  1. Choose route.
    For bonus points, make it a route you’ve walked so many times you basically know it off by heart. For more bonus points check the route on google maps before you start
  2. Get stuck behind a really slow walker
  3. Continue to be stuck behind the slow walker
    Bonus points if the slow walker notices you.
    More bonus points if other people notice.
  4. Turn right before you meant to to get out of the awkward situation with the slow walker
  5. Realise you’ve never been down this road before
  6. Realise you don’t recognise any of the other roads
  7. Pick a road at random and pray

Congratulations, you are now lost

How to be awkward on the underground

  1. Take up the bassoon or other huge instrument
  2. Become proficient at the bassoon and get lessons at the RAM
  3. Go to RHUL to study music
  4. Get on appropriate tube with bassoon on back. Make sure the tube is packed
  5. Hit someone in the face with the bassoon
  6. Accidentally stroke someone’s hair as you grab one of the poles

Congratulations, you are now awkward beyond belief.